Black Flies Post #6

Rutkovsky doesn't make it out ok. In fact, he doesn't make it out at all. He shot himself in the face at a park near the station. This way, he knew members from where he worked would find him, but Ollie, the one who treated him, didn't recognize him at all. He describes him here (WARNING: VERY DISCRIPTIVE!): "One eye, like a ball, hung by its ganglia, the tongue was only attached by a narrow isthmus of flesh, and the face, or the place where you would normally look for the face, was a blasted, ragged, unrecognizable mess of red meat with a hole where the mouth should have been. The guy's upper airway was relatively undamaged....As I did chest compressions blood oozed from his face, ran in rivulets down the tube, and bubbled from his ears"(148). Keep in mind, Rutkovsky did this to himself. He wanted people to know how much he had been hurt by what had happen. He couldn't live with what he had done and with how the mother got off like what she did was ok. He couldn't take it so he committed suicide. Ollie took this very hard. He went back to work with LaFontaine. This man was sick and disgusting. He was powerhungry. Ollie describes working with him here: "Every time I worked with LaFontaine he'd do some f*****-up thing to the unconcious or the helpless patients....I didn't join him, but I didn't stop him either....Really, without knowing it, I was getting worse"(162). He had to stop working with LaFontaine. He started working with Verdis and he still acted like he was with LaFontaine. But eventually, he returned back to his normal state of mind. He even got his first save (bringing someone back to life). He was a hero. That was during his last month of working as an EMT. He had gotten into medical school. That is where the book ends.
This book was horrifying and eye-opening at the same time. I could really see the toll being an EMT took on the people. I could see the stupid things people did to themselves and the irony in having to save them so they could OD again. I could see the struggles people went through everyday and how different people dealt with it. While Rutkovsky didn't make it, and LaFontaine had his own issues, Ollie survived. Verdis was a good medic too. There still were good medics out there. I believe it's all about how people deal with stress, anxiety, and trauma. I think Ollie handled it well. After all, he survived. I would definately recommend this book. While it is gory and bloody, it doesn't sugar-coat the truth, which is nice every once in a while.